Fun and Games in Inaba
by MrYunakitty
Summary: A parody story of Persona 4 made up to entertain my wife yunakitty. Rated T for foul language and sexual suggestiveness. Or something. Rated AWESOME for an appearance by Daisoujou. He is the best character ever.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: Yes, I'm the real life husband of yunakitty, the smut writer. She likes for me to make up stories about characters, and so here's one about Persona. The parts in italics are her talking to me during the story making time.**

_Her: Tell me a story about Persona._

Ugh...really? Well, let's see...

Teddie was living under the Congo River Rapids Ride at Busch Gardens. Unfortunately, so were the surviving members of the Thuggee cult from Temple of Doom. They thought maybe they could find the Shankara stone in the bushes and shit on the ride, and they were looking for a new leader too. Teddie, since he's all dumb and stuff, popped up one day and was like, "Heyyyy! Will you guys be my friends?" They chased his ass out of there with spears.

So he ended up inside the TV.

_Her: How did he become a twink?_

Well, he had a gay soul. And he saw some, you know, Aryan twink on a TV show, and his gay soul longed to be a blue eyed, blond haired twink. And twink Teddie was born.

_Her: Who does he get gay with?_

Hey, you write that shit, not me.

_Her: You don't have to give DETAILS. Just put him with somebody._

Ugh. Well. He got gay with with one guy who wears headphones and always looks like he's hurting.

_Her: Bwahaha! Yosuke? He doesn't look like he's hurting._

He does to me. So anyway, Yosuke eats nothing but Lik a maid Fun Dip and drinks soda. He's a sugar fiend. So he doesn't get enough calories and nutrients, so he's always tired and in pain. Well, Teddie was living gay with him, and he was thirsty. He found some Lik a Maid packets, and he thought it was like Koolaid, so he mixed it up with water. Yosuke came looking for his Lik a Maid to eat, and he started whining because all that was left was the sugar dippin' sticks.

Teddie goes, "I made us some drinks!"

Yosuke says, "You dumb bear! It's not Kool-aid! Oh man, and I was so hungry too." Yosuke was all out of money and he couldn't buy any more. Well, Teddie felt bad, so he, uh, scrounged in the couch and found some coins, and went to the gas station to buy more Lik a maid for Yosuke. He found some extra coins in his pockets, and he bought some Pop Rocks too.

When he got back home, Yosuke was laying down and listening to the Xanadu soundtrack on his headphones. Because he looks like he sucks like that. He was all happy to see the candy Teddie brought. "Great, cause I'm really hungry." He chomped down on the sugar, and he even liked the Pop Rocks.

_Her: So did they have sex then?_

Yeah, I guess, but because Yosuke is so sickly and Teddie's inexperienced, it was all bungling. You know, they couldn't even get their clothes off all the way. It was just like, "Nnn, nnn."

After the gay sex was finished, Yosuke was like, "Hey! Let's go rent a movie. I got a free rental coupon." So he and Teddie went to the ...Inaba Blockbuster. And rented Roller Boogie, because they suck.

_Her:...So, what about creepface Adachi, the bad guy?_

Got arrested for public masturbation. Yep, he was wanking it in a park and his partner caught him. The guy who always looks like he just shit in his pants.

So then, anyway...that guy who hits dogs with a pipe...

_Her: I think you mean Kanji._

Yeah, well, he goes to the circus. He thinks it sucks, so he breaks some glass coke bottles with rocks, and then throws bits of broken glass at the clowns. When he gets bored of that, he goes in an alleyway and spots a ragged old stray dog with a bite out of its ear sniffing in the garbage. He smiles. "C'mere dog," he says. The dog's like, "Burr?" and trots over, and Kanji thumps it on the back with a pipe, and it runs off hollering.

Oh yeah, this story needs some Daisoujou. Okay, Kanji meets Daisoujou at the bus stop.

_Her: What, just sitting there waiting for the bus?_

Yeah. He wants a ride to Busch Gardens, because he found about about the Thuggees from Teddie. Daisoujou fights evil or whatever, and he knows the Thuggees enslave children, so he's got to get down there to wipe Busch Gardens clean of their stink. So Daisoujou took a bus to Florida, and when he got to Tampa he opened his skull mouth and went, "Bah," and all the bad guys died. THE END.

_Her: That was so lame._

Oh really? Well, here's more.

After the movie was over, Teddie was like, "Hey, let's go, uh, to the skating rink!" Cause he's getting all excited watching Roller Boogie, like, "let's do that!" And uh, when they get to the skating rink, they notice that Kanji is getting kicked out, because he hit someone's dog with a pipe. And they meet Daisoujou there! He's skating! Everyone's following him! They're playing some disco music, and there's a disco ball, and everyone's in big circles around him while he roller boogies! He's really turning it out! He's got his mouth open and stuff, all being a cool ass skeleton.

The DJ shouts, "Hey, this skull guy's really got the moves!" And Teddie creams his pants over the whole thing. NOW THE END. GO TO SLEEP.


	2. Chapter 2

_Her: Tell me some more messed up Persona stories._

Um...well, so Teddie and the gang fell in a TV again. And they fell right into where a director was filming a scene of Andy Warhol eating a cheeseburger! The director was like, "Cut! Cut!" And Andy was like, "Um...hello."

His dachshund, Archie, runs in. Kanji growls at him, and says, "I got a pipe with your name on it!"

Andy Warhol says, "Um, please don't hit my dog."

The director gets mad. "Excuse me, kids! We are TRYING to film here."

Teddie jumps forward. "Heyyyy, can I have a bite of your cheeseburger?"

Yosuke goes, "Uh, got any Lik a maid I can eat?"

Andy asks, "What, you mean Fun Dip?"

"Yeah!"

"Uh, no."

Yosuke moans, "Jesus, I gotta lay down." He lays down on the floor, and Archie lays next to him.

_(What's that sleepy eyed slut's name?)_

_Her: Rise._

Rise was like, "Hey, you're the guy who painted the soup cans. I liked that." Andy says thank you. And then Rise says, "But I like the Brillo pads best."

Yosuke says, "Hey, you really oughta do some silk screens of Lik a maid packages."

Andy goes, "Gee...thank you for the...idea."

Well, the director realizes Teddie ate the whole cheeseburger, so he has to cut again and get another burger made. Andy takes Polaroids of all the Persona people, and invites them to a taping of 15 Minutes.

Well, that wanker Adachi is watching all this on his TV and he decides to change the channel.

_Her: It doesn't really work that way..._

Quiet. Anyway, he flips the channel and they end up on another TV show! It's a rerun of Three's Company! Yosuke is Jack Tripper, Teddie is Chrissy, and Naoto is Janet.

_Her: Ohhh, Teddie is totally Chrissy._

I know. So Teddie bops in wearing a slutty little half shirt and pigtails. "Hey, Mr. Roper says the rent is due!"

Naoto frowns and folds her arms. "Well, that's going to be a problem." She points at the couch, where Yosuke is laying down, all weak and sleeping. "He's laying on the rent check!"

"Uh oh!" (pan to Teddie looking dramatically worried.)

Well, that show sucked, so Adachi got done jerking it and turned the channel again. Then it was Gilligan's Island!

_Her: Oh! Rise would be Ginger._

Sure. And of course Teddie, that moron, would be Gilligan. Yosuke is the skipper, who's fat from eating too much Lik a maid. Uh...help me out here...

_Her: Yukiko would be Mary Ann, and I guess Naoto and Kanji would be the Howells...it doesn't really fit, but anyway...and Souji is the professor._

Whatever. They're trying to get off the island, but Teddie breaks the boat made out of coconuts, and Yukiko kicks his ass. Yosuke chases him around with a club, and Rise sluts it up with the Professor.

So Adachi gets bored and changes it again. To Manimal!

_Her: Now WTF is Manimal?_

It's the baddest show ever. So, the dog beating guy...Kanji, is Manimal. Huh huh huh. Manimal. _(I laugh about Manimal for five minutes.)_ He turns into a panther.

Adachi changes it again. It's Different Strokes! Teddie is Arnold, Yosuke is Willis, Chie is Kimberly, and Souji is Mr. Drummond. "Teddie, did you eat all my Lik A Maid?" Yosuke whines.

"Whatchoo talking about, Yosuke?" Teddie says. The audience laughs hysterically. Then it turns into a very special episode, because Mr. Drummond finds the Lik a maid powder on Yosuke's floor, and thinks he's doing drugs. He invites Nancy Reagan over to tell the boys how to just say no. But Yosuke's a sugar fiend, and he can't say no to the Lik a Maid! Nancy Reagan is disgusted with him and kicks him in the balls. Teddie yells, "Whatchoo talking about, Nancy Reagan?" and the audience wets themselves. It's good time fun.

_Her: No more crummy 70's reruns. Do something people have heard of._

_Me: Uhhh.... but I don't watch "today" TV. I only know the stuff from when I was a kid. They'll know it too._

_Her: You don't understand. Most readers were born when we were in high school! Their idea of old school stuff is like, Full House. Or even Friends._

_Me: Well, I gotta do what I know._

So then! Adachi goes to change it again, but he falls into the TV! It's the Brady Bunch! That's the way they all became Persona Bunch! Persona Bunch! Persona Bunch! Ahem, anyway...Souji and Naoto are the parents, and Yukiko, Chie, and Rise are Marcia, Jan, and Cindy. Kanji, Yosuke, and Teddie are the boys. Adachi is Alice the housekeeper! "Hey, why do I have to be the frumpy old middle aged bag?" he grouses.

"Shut it," Naoto orders him, and the episode commences.

The whole family is eating dinner. Chie is upset. "It's always Yukiko, Yukiko, Yukiko," she pouts.

"Don't whine, dear," Naoto tells her. She suddenly drops her fork. "Oh dear. Seems like Adachi put ground up glass in the food again!" The camera pans to Adachi looking devious, while a wah wah horn plays. "Oh, Adachi. Always trying to murder us!" Naoto admonishes him playfully.

Adachi smirks to the camera. "That's not all I put in the food," he says, winking, and it shows him jerking it into the mashed potatoes! Homemade gravy!

_Her: Oh, that's just gross! Ugh!_

The family is about to eat the mashed potatoes with cream gravy, but Daisoujou suddenly busts on the scene to Roller Boogie! It's badass! Everyone gets up and dances with him, even Adachi, who hasn't put away his ding dong. It's flopping around all pathetic. Daisoujou opens his mouth and goes BAH, and Adachi disappears in a cloud of black smoke. Everyone rejoices and they live happily ever after.

_Her: ... ... ..._

**So, I know you crazy kids with your Hannah Montana and Jonas Brothers probably haven't heard of those shows. Go look em up on Wikipedia so you can get the awesomeness.**


End file.
